Campanie · For the mind and soul · Stories of all sorts · Stuff · Thoughts and more

Eloquence

Although I am not quite done with the book American Gods by Neil Gaiman, I can’t help myself and need to share this wonderful, wonderful, wonderful monologue given by a minor character! It encompasses the whole idea of the book and of every religion on Earth… if you believe it will be real and true, if not, then it doesn’t exist for you 🙂

“I can believe things that are true and things that aren’t true and I can believe things where nobody knows if they’re true or not.

I can believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny and the Beatles and Marilyn Monroe and Elvis and Mister Ed. Listen – I believe that people are perfectable, that knowledge is infinite, that the world is run by secret banking cartels and is visited by aliens on a regular basis, nice ones that look like wrinkled lemurs and bad ones who mutilate cattle and want our water and our women.

I believe that the future sucks and I believe that the future rocks and I believe that one day White Buffalo Woman is going to come back and kick everyone’s ass. I believe that all men are just overgrown boys with deep problems communicating and that the decline in good sex in America is coincident with the decline in drive-in movie theaters from state to state.

I believe that all politicians are unprincipled crooks and I still believe that they are better than the alternative. I believe that California is going to sink into the sea when the big one comes, while Florida is going to dissolve into madness and alligators and toxic waste.

I believe that antibacterial soap is destroying our resistance to dirt and disease so that one day we’ll all be wiped out by the common cold like martians in War of the Worlds.

I believe that the greatest poets of the last century were Edith Sitwell and Don Marquis, that jade is dried dragon sperm, and that thousands of years ago in a former life I was a one-armed Siberian shaman.

I believe that mankind’s destiny lies in the stars. I believe that candy really did taste better when I was a kid, that it’s aerodynamically impossible for a bumble bee to fly, that light is a wave and a particle, that there’s a cat in a box somewhere who’s alive and dead at the same time (although if they don’t ever open the box to feed it it’ll eventually just be two different kinds of dead), and that there are stars in the universe billions of years older than the universe itself.

I believe in a personal god who cares about me and worries and oversees everything I do. I believe in an impersonal god who set the universe in motion and went off to hang with her girlfriends and doesn’t even know that I’m alive. I believe in an empty and godless universe of causal chaos, background noise, and sheer blind luck.

I believe that anyone who says sex is overrated just hasn’t done it properly. I believe that anyone who claims to know what’s going on will lie about the little things too.

I believe in absolute honesty and sensible social lies. I believe in a woman’s right to choose, a baby’s right to live, that while all human life is sacred there’s nothing wrong with the death penalty if you can trust the legal system implicitly, and that no one but a moron would ever trust the legal system.

I believe that life is a game, that life is a cruel joke, and that life is what happens when you’re alive and that you might as well lie back and enjoy it.”
Neil Gaiman, American Gods

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Campanie · For the mind and soul · Stuff · Thoughts and more

Let’s Talk.

Powerful words from a wonderful man!

You've Been Hooked!

Never mind cowardly, impotent terrorists or overrated, ungrateful celebrities, the buzz this week is all about mental health.

Mental health. Those two seemingly-harmless words evoke all sorts of images, don’t they? A group of sad sacks gathered for a therapy session. A trembling hand reaching for a bottle of pills – or a glass of liquor. A figure huddled in a corner of a stark white padded room. This is how the world-at-large feels about mental health issues. 

But the truth is, every single one of us is at risk when it comes to the state of our mental health.

We work harder then ever before – for a smaller reward. (Most of us anyway.) We spend far too much time worshiping/envying the rich, as though monetary wealth and fame are the key to true happiness. Society tells us we deserve everything and if we don’t get it? Well, we…

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Campanie · Stories of all sorts · Stuff · Thoughts and more

Books & movies

Thank you BuzzFeed for this wonderful breakdown 🙂

21 Books To Read Before They Hit The Big Screen In 2015

Looking forward to another year of awesome movie adaptations! In order of release date.

posted on Jan. 6, 2015, at 4:53 p.m.

Chris Ritter/BuzzFeed

1. Still Alice, Lisa Genova

Pocket Books / Sony Pictures

What it’s about: The story follows Alice Howland, an accomplished professor and a mother of three grown children. She starts to lose her memory and is later diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s disease, struggling to maintain her lifestyle and sense of self. The book is heartbreaking and emotionally charged, and there’s already Oscar buzz surrounding Julianne Moore’s performance; it’s bound to be a good film to catch!

Amazon review: 4.7/5 stars

Release date: Jan. 16 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Julianne Moore, Alec Baldwin, Kate Bosworth, Kristen Stewart

2. The Mortdecai Trilogy, Kyril Bonfiglioli

Penguin Books

Lionsgate

What it’s about: Charlie Mortdecai, a charming and cultured art dealer, travels to America in search of a stolen painting linked to a lost bank account filled with gold. The book is soaked with sharp humor and it’s impossibly intriguing, making this a perfect fit for Johnny Depp.

Amazon review: 4.2/5 stars

Release date: Jan. 23 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Johnny Depp, Ewan McGregor, Olivia Munn, Gwyneth Paltrow

3. Where Rainbows End (Love, Rosie), Cecelia Ahern

Hachette Book Group

Canyon Creek Films

What it’s about: Rosie and Alex, best friends since childhood, are the type of people who should be together, even if they don’t realize it. Despite being separated as teenagers, they are inseparable via email and letters, and are constantly on the rise of a potential romance. This story comes from the same author as P.S. I Love You, so if you enjoyed that then there’s a good chance you’ll like this too.

Amazon review: 4.2/5 stars

Release date: Feb. 6 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Lily Collins, Sam Claflin, Suki Waterhouse

4. The Last Apprentice (Seventh Son), Joseph Delaney

HarperCollins

Legendary Pictures

What it’s about: Old Gregory is the Spook for the county, and he’s been trying to find a replacement for years. After testing several candidates, he comes down to the last apprentice and his last hope — Young Thomas. His first challenge is up against Mother Malkin, and people are relying on him to succeed. It’s a fantasy thriller and with Jeff Bridges at the helm, it’s a film fans are looking forward to.

Amazon review: 4.4/5 stars

Release date: Feb. 6 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Jeff Bridges, Kit Harington, Julianne Moore, Ben Barnes

5. Fifty Shades of Grey, E.L. James

Vintage

Universal Pictures

What it’s about: An innocent, independent girl named Anastasia Steele falls for a rich, powerful, and dominant man named Christian Grey. Their newly developed romance brings out the dark side in Ana and a very unusual side of Christian. The book is 530 pages of sex and BDSM with a little bit of plot in between. The theaters will be packed, but apparently there’s not nearly as much nudity as the book implies so who knows how raunchy the adaptation will be.

Amazon review: 3.4/5 stars

Release date: Feb. 13 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Jamie Dornan, Dakota Johnson, Rita Ora, Luke Grimes

6. The DUFF, Kody Keplinger

Hachette Book Group

Granville Pictures

What it’s about: Bianca Piper is somewhat of an outcast, but she has a gorgeous group of loyal friends to keep her company. When man-whore Wesley Rush calls her the DUFF (Designated Ugly Fat Friend), Bianca adds him to the top of her enemy list. But when things turn bad at home, she develops a friends-with-benefits relationship with him, and worse, falls for him the more they hang out. The movie is reminiscent of a modern She’s All That.

Amazon review: 4.3/5 stars

Release date: Feb. 20 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Mae Whitman, Bella Thorne, Allison Janey, Robbie Amell

7. Dead Stars (Maps to the Stars), Bruce Wagner

Blue Rider Press

Dan McFadden

What it’s about: Based on the early stages of the Maps to the Stars script, Dead Stars is a satirical takedown of Hollywood culture and fame. The book has mixed reviews, but Julianne Moore won Best Actress at the 2014 Cannes Film Festival for her performance in the movie.

Amazon review: 3.3/5 stars

Release date: Feb. 27 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Julianne Moore, Mia Wasikowska, John Cusack, Robert Pattinson

8. In the Heart of the Sea, Nathaniel Philbrick

Penguin Books

Warner Bros.

What it’s about: This is the true story of the whaleship Essex that was attacked by a sperm whale and left several crew members at sea for more than 90 days, resulting in desperate measures for survival. This was also the story that inspired Herman Melville’s Moby Dick. It’s a fascinating read and will no doubt be just as intriguing to see on screen.

Amazon review: 4.6/5 stars

Release date: March 13 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Cillian Murphy, Charlotte Riley

9. Insurgent, Veronica Roth

HarperCollins

Summit Entertainment

What it’s about: The second book in the Divergent series, Insurgent continues Tris’ fight against Jeanine Matthews and her brutal agenda that threatens to tear society apart and kill Divergents. The book is exciting and hard to put down, and hopefully the movie will follow the novel more than the previews imply.

Amazon review: 4.5/5 stars

Release date: March 20 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Shailene Woodley, Theo James, Ansel Elgort, Kate Winslet

10. Serena, Ron Rash

HarperCollins

Magnolia Pictures

What it’s about: The book is a thrilling story that follows newlyweds George and Serena Pemberton on their journey to create a timber empire and ruthlessly kill all who fall out of favor. When Serena finds out she can’t bear children, she seeks to murder the illegitimate child she believes George is trying to protect. We’ve seen JLaw and Bradley Cooper kill it on screen before, so hopefully we’re in for a treat.

Amazon review: 3.8/5 stars

Release date: March 27 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Jennifer Lawrence, Bradley Cooper

11. The Longest Ride, Nicholas Sparks

Hachette Book Group

Town and Country ./ Photograph by Noe DeWitt

What it’s about: Like any other formulated Nicholas Sparks book, this story involves romance, secrets, relationship problems, and scenes that will make you cry. The Longest Ride is a story of two couples whose lives intersect in profound ways. If you’ve read or seen any other Sparks creations and loved them, this will most likely be no different. Also, say hello to Clint Eastwood’s hot son.

Amazon review: 4.6/5 stars

Release date: April 10 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Scott Eastwood, Britt Robertson

12. The Moon and the Sun, Vonda N. McIntyre

Pocket

Paramount Pictures

What it’s about: Set in 17th-century France, King Louis XIV is on the quest to immortality by way of a captured sea woman, but Marie-Josephe is determined to save the mermaid’s life, for she is not the monster so many people believe her to be. Pierce Brosnan stars and hopefully dominates.

Amazon review: 3.8/5 stars

Release date: April 10

Starring: Pierce Brosnan, William Hurt, Benjamin Walker, Kaya Scodelario

13. Child 44, Tom Rob Smith

Grand Central Publishing

Summit Entertainment

What it’s about: Leo Demidov, a loyal and dedicated officer of Stalin’s Soviet Union, is demoted and exiled when he begins to investigate a serial killing of children. Admitting that these crimes are being committed is a crime itself against the State. Demidov and his wife Raisa set out to find the killer, and uncover shocking revelations in the process.

Amazon review: 4.3/5 stars

Release date: April 17

Starring: Tom Hardy, Gary Oldman, Noomi Rapace

14. Far from the Madding Crowd, Thomas Hardy

Cornhill Magazine

Fox

What it’s about: A classic love story you probably read as part of your high school’s curriculum, Far from the Madding Crowd is about an independent, beautiful woman who attracts three very different suitors: a shepherd, a sergeant, and a rich bachelor. The novel is about tough choices, the nature of relationships, and bouncing back from hardship. Carey Mulligan will make a great Bathsheba!

Amazon review: 4.4/5 stars

Release date: May 1 (Click here to watch the trailer.)

Starring: Carey Mulligan, Michael Sheen, Matthias Schoenaerts, Tom Sturridge

15. Paper Towns, John Green

Penguin Group LLC

Ian Gavan / Getty

What it’s about: Margo Roth Spiegelman, the unattainable girl next door, convinces Quentin to embark on a journey of revenge, but come the next morning, Margo has gone missing and has left clues for Q. He and his friends go on a road trip in search of M, unsure if they will find her dead or alive. If you like John Green books (The Fault in Our Stars), then this should be right up your alley.

Amazon review: 4.3/5 stars

Release date: June 19

Starring: Cara Delevingne, Nat Wolff

16. The Scorch Trials, James Dashner

Delacorte Press

Fox

What it’s about: The second book in the Maze Runner series, Thomas and the Gladers are entering phase two of their “trials” and race to earn a cure for the Flare virus. Chased by Cranks and facing a series of dangerous weather conditions, the boys attempt to complete their mission. The book is just as thrilling as the first and no one is complaining about seeing Dylan O’Brien return to the theaters.

Amazon review: 4.4/5 stars

Release date: Sept. 18

Starring: Dylan O’Brien, Kaya Scodelario, Thomas Brodie-Sangster

17. Black Mass, Dick Lehr and Gerald O’Neill

PublicAffairs

Cross Creek Pictures

What it’s about: Based on the chilling true story of John Connolly and James “Whitey” Bulger, an FBI agent and the leader of an Irish mob, this book details the dark deal between the pair that spiraled out of control. It’s a compelling read, but what’s more interesting is the wig Johnny Depp is sporting.

Amazon review: 4.2/5 stars

Release date: Sept. 18

Starring: Johnny Depp, Benedict Cumberbatch, Dakota Johnson, Sienna Miller

18. Frankenstein (Victor Frankenstein), Mary Shelley

CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

Davis Entertainment

What it’s about: Frankenstein is of course the story of Victor Frankenstein and his creation of a monster built from several corpses. This movie is based on the contemporary adaptations of Mary Shelley’s book and instead focuses on Igor, Victor Frankenstein’s hunchbacked young assistant. It’s an interesting take on a classic tale and Daniel Radcliffe will obviously be great.

Amazon review: 4.2/5 stars

Release date: Oct. 2

Starring: Daniel Radcliffe, James McAvoy

19. Jungle Book, Rudyard Kipling

CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform

Larry Busacca / Getty

What it’s about: An orphan boy named Mowgli is raised by a pack of wolves and befriends a bear named Baloo and a black panther named Bagheera. It’s a classic story and the talented cast of the film makes this a wildly anticipated live-action Disney release.

Amazon review: 4.3/5 stars

Release date: Oct. 9

Starring: Scarlett Johansson, Idris Elba, Bill Murray, Lupita Nyong’o, Christopher Walken, Ben Kingsley

20. Mockingjay (Part 2), Suzanne Collins

Scholastic Press

Lionsgate

What it’s about: The last book of the Hunger Games series, Mockingjay is the completion of Katniss Everdeen’s rebellion against the Capital and her fight to bring President Snow down. The last movie is going to be amazing, but the fact that it’s almost over reallyblows… (sorry)

Amazon review: 4.3/5 stars

Release date: Nov. 20

Starring: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth

21. The Martian, Andy Weir

Random House LLC

Chris Jackson / Getty

What it’s about: Astronaut Mark Watney was one of the first people to land on Mars, and he’s sure to be the first person to die there. After his crew believes Mark died from a dust storm, he’s stranded and completely alone with no way to signal Earth. With the recent trend of space movies (seriously though, what is going on?), this is bound to be another awesome but stressful two hours at the movies.

Amazon review: 4.6/5 stars

Release date: Nov. 27

Starring: Matt Damon, Jessica Chastain, Jeff Daniels, Kristen Wiig

CORRECTION

Astronaut Mark Watney was originally listed as the first person to walk on Mars in “The Martian” but he was actually one of the first people to walk on Mars. Sorry! Jan. 6, 2015, at 7:59 p.m.

About love in all it's glory · Campanie · For the mind and soul · Stories of all sorts · Stuff · Thoughts and more

Respect

Some books are not easy to categorize. For example Me before you written by Jojo Moyes is a book about love, but not the classical romance with the expected ending. It tested my patience, my psychological knowledge and last, but not least my capacity to hold it together 🙂 Wonderful characters and wonderful storytelling make it easy for this book to have a big impact on anyone reading it. And the biggest lesson I learned from this book is that “You know, you can only actually help someone who wants to be helped”, and we all need to respect that.

‘So … ’

‘You’re not going to –’

‘I’m not going to try and change your mind.’

‘If you’re here, you accept it’s my choice. This is the first thing I’ve been in control of since the accident.’

‘I know.’

And there it was. He knew it, and I knew it. There was nothing left for me to do.

Do you know how hard it is to say nothing? When every atom of you strains to do the opposite? I had practiced not saying anything the whole way from the airport, and it was still nearly killing me. I nodded. When I finally spoke, my voice was a small, broken thing. What emerged was the only thing I could safely say.

‘I missed you.’

He seemed to relax then. ‘Come over here.’ And then, when I hesitated. ‘Please. Come on. Right here, on the bed. Right next to me.’

I realized then that there was actual relief in his expression. That he was pleased to see me in a way he wasn’t actually going to be able to say. And I told myself that it was going to have to be enough. I would do the thing he had asked for. That would have to be enough.

I lay down on the bed beside him and I placed my arm across him. I rested my head on his chest, letting my body absorb the gentle rise and fall of it. I could feel the faint pressure of Will’s fingertips on my back, his warm breath in my hair. I closed my eyes, breathing in the scent of him, still the same expensive cedar-wood smell, despite the bland freshness of the room, the slightly disturbing scent of disinfectant underneath. I tried not to think of anything at all. I just tried to be, tried to absorb the man I loved through osmosis, tried to imprint what I had left of him on myself. I did not speak. And then I heard his voice. I was so close to him that when he spoke it seemed to vibrate gently through me.

‘Hey, Clark,’ he said. ‘Tell me something good.’

I stared out of the window at the bright-blue Swiss sky and I told him a story of two people. Two people who shouldn’t have met, and who didn’t like each other much when they did, but who found they were the only two people in the world who could possibly have understood each other. And I told him of the adventures they had, the places they had gone, and the things I had seen that I had never expected to. I conjured for him electric skies and iridescent seas and evenings full of laughter and silly jokes. I drew a world for him, a world far from a Swiss industrial estate, a world in which he was still somehow the person he had wanted to be. I drew the world he had created for me, full of wonder and possibility. I let him know a hurt had been mended in a way that he couldn’t have known, and for that alone there would always be a piece of me indebted to him. And as I spoke I knew these would be the most important words I would ever say and that it was important that they were the right words, that they were not propaganda, an attempt to change his mind, but respectful of what Will had said.

I told him something good.

Time slowed, and stilled. It was just the two of us, me murmuring in the empty, sunlit room. Will didn’t say much. He didn’t answer back, or add a dry comment, or scoff. He nodded occasionally, his head pressed against mine, and murmured, or let out a small sound that could have been satisfaction at another good memory.

‘It has been,’ I told him, ‘the best six months of my entire life.’

There was a long silence.

‘Funnily enough, Clark, mine too.’

And then, just like that, my heart broke. My face crumpled, my composure went and I held him tightly and I stopped caring that he could feel the shudder of my sobbing body because grief swamped me.

About love in all it's glory · Campanie · For the mind and soul · Stuff · Thoughts and more

Non-monogamy?

Helen Croydon, author of Screw The Fairytale: A Modern Guide to Sex and Love (John Blake), shares her guide to five relationship trends everyone’s talking about in this article I found online, so I ask myself and anyone out there tuning in… is monogamy almost forgotten?

Non-monogamy: The 5 sexual relationships rewriting the rule book

Non-monogamy: The 5 sexual relationships rewriting the rule book
Get it on – the relationship rule book is being ripped up (Picture: Getty)

Open relationships, multiple dating… it has become cool to experiment with new relationship rules.

Celebs from Cameron Diaz to Carla Bruni-Sarkozy have turned their noses up at lifelong fidelity and we’ve had a wave of monogamy-bashing books.

But people aren’t just sleeping around. There are tried-and-tested templates.

Tom Daley  is dating a man but still fancies women (Picture: Brian J. Ritchie Photography/Rex)
Tom Daley is dating a man but still fancies women (Picture: Brian J. Ritchie Photography/Rex)

Flexi-sexuals

This is the new buzz word for straight men and women who experiment with bisexuality.

It’s not just adventurous singletons: flexi-sexuals in relationships are experimenting with their own sex, with their partner’s consent.

Consider the flexi-sexual affair as a mini-step for those nervous about plunging into a fully open relationship. Sexual competition is much easier to bear if one’s nemesis is of a different gender.

Sexual flexibility or ‘fluidity’ became a media buzz word after a National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles revealed last year that the number of women reporting same-sex partners has increased from 1.8 per cent to 7.9 per cent over the past 20 years.

The trend for switching sides has also been propelled by the likes of Sex And The City actress Cynthia Nixon, singer Alison Goldfrapp and TV presenter Mary Portas, who all started relationships with women after years of being with a man.

Comedian Rosie Wilby even set about experimenting with flexi-sexuality as part of her comedy show Is Monogamy Dead?

In December, Olympic star Tom Daley announced he was dating a man but ‘still fancies girls’, prompting talk that he could be pansexual – yet another name for yet another model of sexuality.

Could you stay home with a cup of cocoa while your other half was running around town? Some do (Picture: supplied)
Could you stay home with a cup of cocoa while your other half was running around town? Some do (Picture: supplied)

Hybrid relationships

It doesn’t have to take two to explore an extra-marital frisson. If you can’t get your partner’s enthusiasm for an open relationship, just get their consent.

It’s increasingly common for one partner to grant the more sexually charged of the two permission to let off steam, while they stay at home with a hot chocolate and get some peace and quiet.

A hybrid relationship or ‘mono-non-mono’ may seem like one half is getting a better deal but, among the couples I interviewed, many are happy for their relationship to remain as good as asexual, instead defining their connection through security and friendship.

One 52-year-old wife granted her husband permission to use no-strings website Maritalaffair.co.uk as it let her off the hook.

‘I’ve gone through the menopause and I’m not interested in sex any more,’ she says.

‘I love seeing my grandchildren and days out with friends. My husband is bored by all that. As long as he doesn’t rub it in, I turn a blind eye to him going dating. He never spends the night away and he’s happier because of it.’

Multiple Dating

This is the dating equivalent of try-before-you-buy. A chic friend from New York once joked that in Manhattan people date, but the less romantic British simply ‘have a drunk snog, spend a few evenings watching TV and then you’re going out’.

Not any more. Internet dating and the likes of location-mapping dating apps such as Tinder mean we’re less likely to settle for the first thing that throws itself at us.

The buzz has become the dating, not the relationship. No matter how many boxes our date ticked, there are plenty more available singletons to try.

A recent survey by JDate and Christian Mingle found that 63 per cent of women and 53 per cent of men online communicate with multiple people at the same time.

Emma Sayle runs Killing Kittens, an upmarket and exclusive sex party night (Picture: Ian Stratton/Rex)
Emma Sayle runs Killing Kittens, an upmarket and exclusive sex party night (Picture: Ian Stratton/Rex)

Posh swingers

They don’t go to swinger parties, they go to ‘couples’ parties’.

Gone are steamy basement clubs – in their place are exquisite private parties with hot waiters in thongs serving canapés and champagne to professionals parading around in Agent Provocateur three-pieces.

The trend emerged nine years ago when socialite Emma Sayle, former classmate of the Duchess of Cambridge, founded Killing Kittens, exclusive parties in mansions and penthouses.

At one event at Halswell House in Somerset, where I conducted my research, a well-dressed couple in their mid-fifties explained: ‘We hadn’t considered anything like this but then the kids leave home, you pass milestone birthdays and you start to think, what now?

‘We both felt that we were entering into a new phase of life so we started to talk about what sex would be like with other people. We didn’t do anything about it and then we read an article about classy sex parties.’

Elliott Gould, Natalie Wood, Robert Culp and Dyan Cannon in the movie Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice (Picture: Allstar Collection/Columbia Pictures)
Elliott Gould, Natalie Wood, Robert Culp and Dyan Cannon in the movie Bob & Carol & Ted & Alice (Picture: Allstar Collection/Columbia Pictures)

Polyamory

Think multiple love, not multiple sex. Polyamorous (or ‘poly’) people believe love isn’t a finite resource. You can spread it, lavish it and reproduce it for as many partners who capture your heart.

Matt, a 26-year-old philosophy student in a four-way relationship with two women and one man, says: ‘I can say I have a favourite book but I can still love other books. Why can’t I do the same for people?’

Some poly people have a ‘primary’ partner they consider their number one and everyone else is ‘secondary’.

Others love multiple partners equally. If it’s a three-way bond, it’s a triad; if there are four, it’s a quad.

Some followers of the poly lifestyle choose to be ‘open’, which means they are free to date anyone. Others are ‘closed’, so only date others within a defined group

Bucharest Life · Campanie · Stories of all sorts · Stuff · Thoughts and more

The 5 people you meet in the hospital

I don’t think anyone should stay in a hospital, but if you ever have spend at least one week I have a few pieces of advice and a list of 5 people you can meet and should have on your side.

Advice 1: Bring a book, a tablet and a phone with a great internet plan!

Advice 2: Stock up your tablet with movies and tv shows and books if you read them on your tablet 🙂

Advice 3: Be prepared to sleep all day and all night and enjoy it!

Person 1: The head nurse, should be your best friend from the scheduling part because her attitude towards you will be the attitude you get from the rest of the nurses.

Person 2: Your roommate or roommates should be kept happy at all times either by being quiet or chatty when needed 🙂 fruit or candy doesn’t hurt either 🙂

Person 3: The doctor.  He/she will usually be nice and friendly, but you need to make sure you understand that you are not the only one in the ward so be patient and if all else fails hunt him/her down on the hallway 🙂

Person 4: The wardrobe/the cantine lady depending on how much interaction you have with them. In my case the wardrobe lady was the one I wanted to keep happy, so a little tip in her pocket was needed 😉

Person 5: Last, but not least the other people on the ward can be a wonderful source of information and should be able to help you navigate the labyrinth called the hospital. Or as my roommate says it: you’re either sociable or they make you sociable! 🙂
So my hospital experience was nice and pleasant and short, and hopefully my recovery will be just as quick and painless and I hope more people out there are having a short and pleasant hospital stay! 🙂

Campanie · For the mind and soul · Thoughts and more

Confidence

Just a wonderful article about the habits of confident people 🙂

– Susie Moore

“With confidence, you have won before you have started.” — Marcus Garvey

Confidence is often the single differentiator between people who get what they want and people who don’t. Those who think and believe they can do something — run a marathon, start an entrepreneurial venture, ask someone out (and have them say yes), win a competitive promotion, fit into their pre-pregnancy jeans, build a fun social circle, well… they do it.

Our mind is a very powerful tool, and the impact of our thoughts and words cannot be underestimated. Our thoughts create our emotions. Our emotions create our actions. Our actions create our life. Confident people have greater control over their minds and have tuned their mental station to one of “I can.”

Here are nine things that confident people do that you can apply to your life:

1. Do not overcomplicate. You want something? Great! Create a plan to make it yours. Keep your eye on the prize and do not get distracted by other peoples noise or by your own ability to over-think.

2. Focus on what you want. Confident people keep a positive vision in mind of the future. They expect good things to happen to them, and as a result they do, as expectation is a very powerful force.

3. Act as if it’s already yours. People who are self-assured allow their language and actions to be in line with their outcome. This inspires confidence in others.

4. Use words with intention. Consider the difference with two people discussing their new blog. One could be, “Yes, I am a blogger. You like vintage purses too? Awesome! We must connect — check out the new images I posted at…” vs. “Well, I am trying to blog but am not sure I am doing it right (nervous laugh).” Who do you think gets the most views and shares?

5. Listen but don’t pay heed to others’ opinions. Other people are well meaning and sometimes err on the side of caution. Confident people listen to other people but do not let their difference of perspective take them off track. It’s your life!

6. Dedicate time to what matters. Confident people are happy to say no to things to make sure they have time and energy for their priorities. Funnily enough, people treat them with more respect as a result.

7. Act humble. Confident types don’t talk endlessly about their successes. I was once at a large corporate event and I was speaking to an outgoing and likeable woman who said she “worked in publishing.” I found out later that evening that she was the editor-in-chief of one New York’s most influential magazines. Confident people let their success speak for itself and don’t need to vocalize it.

8. Know failure is sometimes inevitable and don’t fear it. Worrying about failure can keep us from doing anything at all. Confident people are still confident even when they fail. When the chips are down they know it will pass.

9. Repeat all of the above! Confidence building takes a lifetime. The more we practice confidence as an attitude, the easier it becomes.

The most successful and happy people are not born the most rich, beautiful or talented. They just believe in themselves and go for what they want. Confidence is also a highly attractive quality in others as we all secretly aspire to have more self-assurance. “I can” and “I can’t” thoughts create very different emotional spirals, as the mind is very obedient and follows whichever path we direct it. Which do you choose?